Decent into Madness
by CzarThwomp
Summary: We all know the root of Oleander's madness, but what if there was more to it than that? When was the exact moment that Oleander's mind finally snapped and he began formulating his plan for global domination? How did he meet Dr. Caligosto Loboto? Takes place a year before the events of Psychonauts. Rated T, just to be safe, for slight swearing and darker themes.
1. Hop, Little Bunny, Hop!

**Disclaimer: Psychonauts is property of Double Fine Studios. I, the writer of this fanfic, do not own the characters or am associated with the company in any way, shape, or form in the production of this non-canonical, non-profit fanfic.**

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It's a regular day at Whispering Rock: the sun is smiling, Ranger Cruller is shooing kids out of the off-limit woods, and there is a sale on dream fluff. Yep, everything is normal… until Oleander arrives ten minutes late.

Being ten minutes late may not sound strange to the average person, but Oleander is infamous for always being early. In fact, there is a rumor among the campers that Oleander lives in the Main Lodge bathroom, given that he is the only one who uses it, on account of the smell. When Oleander walks into the camp, the children are able to see just why their "beloved" coach is late: Instead of his normal military outfit, Oleander is wearing a navy polo shirt with tan khaki pants. Instead of his normal military boots, he is wearing black loafers and instead of his normal military helmet, he opts to leave it at home and instead just show his buzz cut hair. But the most noticeable thing about Oleander today is that he reeks of cheap cologne which smells like a combination of wet dog fur and rotten cheddar cheese.

Oleander struts into the camp and as he walks, the campers stop what activities they were doing beforehand and just stare in awe. As Oleander continues walking, he pulls Vernon, who is walking in the opposite direction as him, off to the side to ask him a question.

"Tripe, have you seen Agent Vodello?"

"Yeah, last I saw her, she was at the lake getting ready for her class."

"Thank you for your assistance."

Oleander then begins to walk towards the lake when suddenly; Vernon decides to ask him a question.

"Coach, can I ask you something?"

Oleander then slowly turns around, dreading the seemingly endless one-sided conversation that he knows is going to occur, and grinds his teeth as he responds.

"What is it, Tripe?"

"Why are you all dressed up today?"

"Well, I'm attending an important business meeting, so I need to look my best."

Upon hearing that response, Vernon begins to tell one of his infamous stories as Oleander's face turns into a disgruntled frown as his milky right eye begins to twitch. "This reminds of the time when I had to dress up for my school photos. That day, I woke up at 7:00 a.m. thanks to my alarm clock. And then I turned off my alarm clock. And then I got out of my bed. And then I made my bed. And then I went to the bathroom. And then I washed my hands. And then I returned to my bedroom. And then I got my dress shirt and dress pants out of my closet. And then I took off my pajamas. And then I put on my underwear. And then I put on my dress shirt. And then I put on my dress pants. And then I went downstairs to the kitchen. And then I got a bagel out of the refrigerator. And then I ate the bagel. And then I drank a cup of orange juice. And then I fed my dog, Lady. And then I brushed my teeth. And then I-"

Oleander then looks down at his watch as he interrupts Vernon. "I'd love to stay and listen, but I have to get going."

Oleander then starts sprinting towards the lake to get away from Vernon as the young boy yells out to his fleeing mentor.

"I'll send you an audio log of the rest of the story!"

When Oleander final gets to the lake, he is panting from his five minute sprint to get away from the most boring nine year-old to walk the face of the Earth. Oleander then quickly composes himself as he began to tense up a little from nervousness. In order to calm himself down, Oleander decides to give himself a pep talk.

"Okay Morry, you can do this… She's your friend and co-worker, just go up to her and ask her out. How hard could it be?"

Oleander then walks out onto the beach and is heartbroken when he sees Sasha and Milla sitting on the dock and holding hands. Oleander then hides in a nearby bush as he listens in on their conversation.

"Agent Vodello, can I please return to my lab now? I have to run some tests on the Brain Tumbler and I have some files to sort. We can do this during our lunch date in a few hours." Sasha says as he nervously adjusts his sunglasses.

"Sasha, we've been dating for two months; you can call me by my first name. As for your previous question, no, you can't leave. Sasha, you're cooped up all day in that underground lab and only come out for meals and when it is time to leave. You need some fresh air and a change of scenery, Darling." Mia slightly pouts to the stoic man as she affectionately rubs her head against his shoulder.

Sasha then slightly blushes as a shy smile spreads across his face. "I guess your right Agent- sorry… Milla. I'll try harder to change that, if not for me… then for you."

Milla then hugs Sasha and strokes his hair as she giggles to herself.

"Aw, Sasha… that's the sweetest thing that I heard you say to anyone. I knew that beneath your stone cold exterior there was a warm, caring heart."

"I'm not the Tin Man, Milla. It's just that ever since I was a child, it was always hard for me to express my emotions. Maybe it's because my father was a widower and I never had any motherly guidance."

"Well, now you have me darling, so that excuse won't work anymore. I would love for this moment to last forever, but the children will be arriving to class any minute now and I have to prepare; but here's something to hold you over until lunch, darling…"

Milla then passionately kisses Sasha for a full 15 seconds before pulling away and staring at the stoic agent with a seductive look in her eyes.

"I hardly think that that is an appropriate display of affection in a public setting such as this…"

Milla then playfully slaps Sasha's shoulder as the two agents go their separate ways for the time being: with Sasha returning to his lab and Milla going to the middle of the lake to prepare her mind for the campers.

Meanwhile, Oleander emerges from the bush, trying to hold back his tears. As he attempts to leave the beach, Bobby Zilch approaches him.

"Hey Coach, I need you to help me settle a bet with Benny."

Oleander, who is clearly not in the mood to interact with anyone at the moment, responds to bobby with a tone of voice that is an overt combination of embitterment and irritation. "What does this have to do with me, Zilch?"

Bobby, who is as emotionally oblivious as ever, continues with no reservations. "Are you wearing that outfit because you're gay or are you wearing it because you're metrosexual?"

Upon hearing that question, a fierce scowl spreads across Oleander's face as he begins to clench his teeth. Oleander then uses his telekinesis to pick up Bobby and hurl him into Lake Oblongata.

Oleander then cancels all of his classes for the day and then hides in Ranger Cruller's shack in the middle of the off-limits woods so that no one would see him cry. While there, Oleander contemplates his experiences with Milla.

When he first met her when they first started working at the camp, alongside Sasha, she was the only person who did not shy away from his aggressive personality. Whereas other psychonauts, such as Sasha, were repelled by Oleander's bravado and decided to give the man space, Milla saw it as a cry for attention and knew from it that Oleander was an insecure man that just needed a friend.

Milla then spent many months, during the camp season and at the agency for the rest of the year, trying to get to know Oleander. From genuinely listening to his military stories, which she could easily tell were fabricated, but would never hurt the proud man's feelings by letting him know, to even backing him homemade cookies once and a while.

After doing this for some time, Oleander felt comfortable enough around Milla to tell her some of his troubles once and a while, which she was both surprised and flattered by, on account of how tightlipped the stout psychonaut was around everyone else. She had learned from him that, like Sasha, he lost his mother when he was an infant, but Unlike Sasha, his father wasn't the nicest man. Whereas Sasha's father was describe to be a quiet, but gentile man, Oleander's father was cruel man.

Oleander's father, from his time as a butcher, developed the philosophy that anything thing that was small in size, from rabbits to people, were worthless creatures that were only good for feeding the rest of society. This philosophy was strengthened by the fact that Oleander's mother died due to birth complications when giving birth to their son, which he subliminally blamed on Oleander, who was always small for his age.

Almost every day of his childhood, Oleander's father would remind his son of how he was worthless because of his small size and would always be worthless. That's when, after he failed to get into the Army, Navy, Airforce, and even cooking school, he decided to become a psychonaut, where he would not be judged by his height, but by the strength of his mind.

After hearing this, Milla was reminded of her time working at the Orphanage. The way that the children felt neglected and worthless was just like how Oleander is acting now. What Oleander needed was not just a friend, but a mother, and that was exactly what she was going to do for the man.

After that, Milla became even friendlier with Oleander where in addition to eating lunch with him and talking with him, when she wasn't on a mission with Sasha, of course, she was helping him with in the way a mother would help her child, such as cooking diners for him and helping him clean his messy apartment. For Milla, while she always wore a smile on her face and was warm to everyone, on the inside, the destruction of the orphanage and the deaths of her children haunted her at every waking moment; so when she learned that Oleander never had a mother, she saw this as gift to help her escape her guilt and help another person while she was at it. While many people thought that Milla was helping Oleander by being his friend, she saw it as him helping her.

Oleander knew that Milla had worked in an orphanage before becoming a psychonaut, but she had never told him about how it burnt down and the death of the children, so Oleander was completely oblivious to her mental condition and perceived her acts of kindness as signs that she was attracted to him.

As the months turned to years, Oleander had become more and more attracted to Milla. Not only did he like her for her body, he also liked her for her energetic personality, her warm, nurturing nature, and the fact that she was willing to joke with him about his foil and rival in the field, Sasha, or smoky egghead as he liked to call the German psychonaut. So it was no wonder why, when Oleander had finally mustered up the courage to ask her out, he was so mortified to hear that she had been already dating Sasha, his sworn enemy for some time.

As Oleander sulked in the shack, he began to grow angrier and angrier as he tried to piece together what the hell she saw in Sasha that made him so appealing to her. As far as he could tell, Sasha was an introverted stick-in-the-mud who spent all of his free time working on experiments and running scientific tests. Oleander knew that it couldn't be Sasha's sense of fashion, on account that he always wore that ugly striped sweater and those sunglasses that made him look like a douche. Oleander knew that it wasn't Sasha's personality because he was always too logical and pessimistic about everything. So, by process of elimination, Oleander concluded that Milla was attracted to Sasha because of his height. His father was right; no woman would ever love a short man. Milla never liked him, she pitied him.

Once Oleander came to that conclusion, everything started to make sense: the talks, the cookies, the warm attitude… it wasn't because she saw him as a friend, but rather, as one of the children from her damn orphanage that she would go on and on about, which he had no idea why she left in the first place if she loved it so much.

As Oleander sat in the shack, he then heard the voice of his father speaking to him within his mind. "Is it really so surprising that she doesn't like you? You're a little bunny and little bunnies are good for nothing but food."

Oleander then grips the sides of his head and mutters to himself. "No! I'm a psychonaut and I'm a big bunny who's worth something."

Oleander's father's voice then lets out a cold, gravely laugh. "Riiight… Now don't run, little bunny, or else Daddy's gonna kill you! Bun Bun Bun!"

Oleander's thoughts are then interrupted when he hears a knock on the shakes door and sees Ranger Cruller standing outside with an irritated look on his face. "I don't care if you're the head coach Oleander, these woods and this shack are off-limits, no exceptions. Now git!

Oleander then complies and heads back to his workstation in the section of the camp containing the campers' cabins. For the rest of the day, Oleander works on paperwork and other such tasks that he had been putting off. When the day is over, Oleander leaves his station and goes to his jeep.

When Oleander has to use levitation to get in his vehicle, he hears the voice of his father belittling him yet again. "Bun Bun Bun!"

When Oleander goes to the grocery store on the way home to pick up some toiletries and he has to use telekinesis to reach the items on the top shelf, he hears his father. "Bun Bun Bun!"

When Oleander gets home and takes a shower, he hears his father's voice as he is washing the lower half of his body. "Bun Bun Bun!"

After Oleander finishes his shower, he goes to bed. In his sleep, he is experiencing a recurring nightmare that he has been having ever since he could remember. In this nightmare, Oleander is a bunny who is running away from his father, who is chasing after him with two giant, rusty cleavers, and no matter how fast he runs, his father catches him, kills him, and prepares his meat to be sold in his butcher shop. Normally at this point, the nightmare would end, but tonight, it went on to show Oleander's father selling his meat to Sasha and Milla, who then proceeded to eat him as dinner during their date. Oleander then woke up out of shock and after a few minutes of deep breathing, he then proceeded to cry himself back to sleep.

The next day, Oleander went to the camp in his normal outfit and held his morning session of Basic Braining without any hitches. At around noon, Oleander ends Basic Braining for the day and heads to the Main Lodge for lunch. At this point, Oleander was starting to get over the fact that Milla was dating Sasha, but little did he realize that how lunch that day would change his life for the worse.


	2. It All Started With a Pudding Cup

For Oleander, he is actually excited for lunch today because it's Pudding Cup Thursday and Chef Cruller is serving his famous Psytanium Pudding Cups (which don't actually contain psytanium). While Cruller may be a pain in the ass with his multiple personalities and the fact that he favors Sasha and Milla for missions during the camp's offseason, his chef persona sure knows how to make good pudding; which all of the campers believed as well because when he got to the Main Lodge, all of the campers were already in the lunch line.

With a disgruntled sigh, Oleander steps into the line before it becomes any longer. While he is waiting in line, Sasha enters the Main Lodge and steps into the line right behind him.

"So… how has your day been going, Morrey? Agent Vodello is wrapping up a few things at her workstation, so she told me to go on ahead and eat my lunch. With how she controls me, you'd think that we were married. Funny, right…?" Sasha says in a nervous voice while rubbing the back of his head.

"I must be hearing things because I know for a fact that Agent Nein never makes small talk. What's your angle?" Oleander says without turning around to face Sasha.

"I just wanted to improve my social skills with some small talk, Morrey. Is that so wrong?"

"Then it must be a cold day in Hell…" Oleander, who is more concerned about whether or not they'll run out of pudding before he gets to the pudding cups, says with a dismissive voice.

"Look, Morrey, this isn't easy for me; I'm only doing this because Agent Vodello has been encouraging me to interact more often with others. I don't think that it would be too demanding if you'd at least face me and acknowledge my question."

"I'm sorry if I'm not some social butterfly, Nein, but I have other things on my mind and you're not one of them." Oleander says with his back still facing Sasha.

After a few moments of awkward silence between the two Psychonauts, Oleander and Sasha finally reach the table containing the pudding cups, which now has only one left. Oleander, with a big grin on his face, is about to reach out and grab it, when suddenly, Sasha uses his telekinesis to lift the pudding cup and place it on his own tray.

Oleander then hears his father's voice again. "Sorry, little bunny, but pudding cups are for the important big bunnies. Why don't you run along and eat some grass? Ha ha ha!"

Oleander, who is furious that Sasha stole his pudding cup, turns around to face Sasha and flashes him a glare that could kill while he clenches his teeth. "What's the big idea, Nein!? Who do you think you are taking MY pudding cup!?"

"I'm sorry, Morrey, I didn't know that you wanted it. Since you were in front of me, it's only fair that you have it." Sasha then uses his telekinesis to place the pudding cup on Oleander's tray.

Oleander then grabs the pudding cup and puts it back on the table. "I don't want it now."

Sasha then telekinetically placed the pudding cup back on Oleander's tray. "Why don't you want it anymore, Morrey?"

Oleander then places the pudding cup back on the table. "I don't want it if you're the one offering it to me." Oleander puts as he crosses his arms.

Sasha shrugs his shoulders. "Fine, I'll just take it for myself, then."

Before Sasha can telepathically grab the pudding cup, Oleander grabs it and throws it across the room, causing it to hit into a wall, burst open, and spill all over the floor."

"What is your problem, Morrey?"

"My 'problem' is that I have to deal with people like you who think that they can just take whatever they want and then 'pity' others when they ask for what is rightfully theirs's!"

"I didn't know that you wanted it and I gave it to you, what more do you want!?" Sasha says as he throws his arms in the air.

"You could have waited until I passed the table before you took the pudding cup."

"Well excuse me for thinking that you'd immediately grab it if you wanted it so badly."

"I was savoring the moment, Nein, something that I learned in the Army after we would work so hard to win a battle."

"That's nice, but in a line, you must keep moving, you lingering about 'savoring' the moment of grabbing a pudding cup is just Ludacris."

Oleander then hears his father's voice again. "Why don't you just shut your mouth? No one cares about what an insignificant little bunny like you has to say."

In a fit of rage, Oleander psi-blasts Sasha's left knee, causing the normally stoic psychonaut to fall to the ground and cry out in pain.

"What the hell, Morrey!? Why did you just psi-blast my knee!?" Sasha says through clenched teeth as he grips his injured knee while trying to hold back tears, though Sasha has a very good reason to.

You see, the reason why Oleander was assigned to be the head coach at Whispering Rock was not as a punishment or some form of mockery, but rather as a way to help him contain his aggressive energy. With his short fuse personality, Oleander's psi-blasts are about three times stronger than those of a normal Psychonaut. Thus, the higher-ups in the agency felt that by having him work with children, Oleander would have to learn to control his anger, whether he wanted to or not.

"Not so high and mighty now, eh Nein? Now that you're on my level, whose the 'Ludacris' one now?" Oleander says with a cynical grin as he stands over Sasha.

"I stand corrected, you're not ridiculous… you're insane!"

"Let me ask you Nein; could an insane man do this…!"

"Oleander then uses his telekinesis to grab Sasha and then throws him against a wall and right onto the table that is being occupied by Vernon.

"Hey, Agent Nein, I like lunch time. This reminds me of this one time when I made myself a sandwich."

Sasha, who is dazed from the impact of hitting the wall, doesn't respond to the longwinded child as Oleander telekinetically grabs Sasha again and begins to repeatedly slam him face first into the table over and over again.

"This is for being a cold and uncaring prick!" Oleander thinks to himself as he slams Sasha into the table.

"This is for the psychonauts preferring you over me when it comes to True Psychic Tales Magazine!" Oleander thinks to himself as he slams Sasha into the table again.

"This is for stealing Milla away from me!" Oleander thinks to himself as he slams Sasha into the table a third time.

As Oleander is thinking these thought, Vernon is telling Sasha his unending story while ignoring the fact that the Psychonaut is being repeatedly slammed against the table, mostly because he knows that the agent won't try to escape. "And then I took out two slices of bread and put them on the counter. And then I took out the baloney and placed it next to the bread. And then I took out some butter and placed it next to the baloney. And then I went over to the drawer and took out a knife. And then I placed the knife next to the bread. And then I took out two slices of bread. And then I used the knife to spread some butter on one of the slices. And then I put the knife in the sink for my mom to wash. And then I placed two slices of baloney on the buttered slice of bread. And then I put the other slice of bread on top of the baloney. And then I took out a plate from the nearby cabinet. And then I put my sandwich on the plate. And then I got out a glass. And then I got some milk out of the fridge. And then I poured some milk into the glass. And then I put the milk back in the fridge. And then I took the glass of milk and the sandwich over to my kitchen table. And then I sat down at the table. And then I took a bite of my sandwich. And then I took another bite. And then I took another bite. And then my throat got dry, so I took a sip of milk. And then I took another bite. And then I took another bite…"

Vernon is then interrupted by the intercom in the Main Lodge being used by Cruller. "Oleander, please report to the Scout Master's Chamber immediately!"

Oleander, knowing very well that Cruller, even in his current state, still held connections that could get him easily removed from the psychonauts, releases Sasha, who plops onto the table face first, and storms out of the Main Lodge to get to Cruller's Sanctuary. As he leaves the Main Lodge, Milla enters and is horrified to see all of the campers standing around Sasha, who is face down on Vernon's table.

Milla then rushes over to Sasha and holds him. "Sasha, darling, are you alright?" Milla says with an overtly worried tone.

"My name is Yon Yonson, I live in Wisconsin. I work in the lumberyard there…" Sasha says in a sedated voice while his head wobbles back and forth.

Milla lightly shakes Sasha out of worry. "Sasha, what happened to you?"

"Everyone that I meet when I walk down the street says 'Hello! What's your name?' And I say: My name is Yon Yonson…" Sasha says as he drifts into unconsciousness.

Milla, who sees the pudding smeared all over the nearby wall, knows what had just transpired and starts to become worried for her short-tempered friend.

Meanwhile, Oleander enters Cruller's Sanctuary and sees him standing in his normal spot in the center of the lair. "So you wanted to see me, Cruller?" Oleander asks the elderly man.

"Morrey, I normally am able to tolerate your anger management issues, but today you've gone too far."

"Look, that Egghead was asking for it! I was only defending what was mine!" Oleander says with a scowl as he shakes his fist in the air.

"It was a just a pudding cup, Morrey."

"It wasn't the pudding cup; it was the principle regarding the pudding cup!"

"Regardless, I'm gonna have to punish you. Normally, this kind of behavior would result in automatic termination from the Psychonauts; but since you're such a dedicated agent and since this was probably a one-off occurrence, I'll make an exception and give you a lighter punishment."

"What do you have in mind…?" Oleander asks with a hint of hesitation in his voice.

"Don't worry, Morrey, it's nothing too bad. You see, the agency has appointed Sasha and Milla to alternate each night in regards to monitoring the abandoned insane asylum here, Thorney Towers; and since Sasha can't do his shift tonight, on account of today's incident, and because I feel that Milla shouldn't have to suffer, you'll be taking Sasha's place tonight."

"If it's abandoned, Cruller, why do we even have to patrol it?"

"There are still a few inmates that refuse to leave and we need to make sure that they don't escape, reach the camp, and endanger the children."

Oleander, knowing that any confrontation with Cruller at this point will only worsen his punishment, agrees to patrol the asylum that night."

Later that evening, with her lessons for the day and Sasha's injuries taken care of, Milla, knowing how defensive Oleander is over his pudding, goes to Cruller's Sanctuary to try to prevent Oleander from being fired from the Psychonauts. "Ford, please don't be too hard on Morrey for his actions today; he's just very…" Milla pauses and scratches her head as she thinks about the right word to describe Oleander. "passionate and he didn't truly mean it."

"Don't worry Milla, I didn't fire Morrey."

"You didn't?" Milla says with a sigh of relief.

"No, but I had to reprimand him somehow, so I made him take Sasha's shift tonight and patrol Thorny Towers."

Milla's eyes widen as she thinks about Oleander crossing paths with HIM. She knew how that man could get into your head and with Oleander's disposition; this could end very badly for all of them. Panicking, Milla grabs onto Cruller's shoulders and speaks to him with dread in her voice. "Darling, where is Morrey right now?"

"He left just a little while ago to head off to the asylum."

"Listen to me, darling, let me go and take Morrey's place tonight. If he goes to that asylum, it could be catastrophic!" Milla says as he gingerly shakes Cruller.

"Look Milla, Morrey is a skilled psychonaut and can take care of himself. Now Morrey needs to be punished for his actions, so I don't want you relieving him from his patrol duties. Understand?" Cruller says in a strong, stern voice.

Milla, knowing very well how Ford would probably have Oleander removed from the Psychonauts if she disobey Cruller, lowers her head in defeat. "Yes, sir…" Milla says in a worried tone.

As Milla leaves the Sanctuary, she can't help but worry how Oleander would respond to THAT inmate. She knows that he wouldn't be able to physically harm Oleander, but given her intuition on Oleander's mental state, she knows that if Oleander interacts with that sadistic monster, he could unleash a side of Oleander that could endanger them all. She knows that she could try to explain it to Cruller for hours on end, but it would just result in him dismissing the notion and saying that it's her motherly nature jumping to conclusions.

As Milla gets back to her car, she tries to reassure herself that Oleander is more than mentally tough enough to not let HIM get to him. Yes… Oleander would be perfectly fine and everything would return to normal tomorrow. Though no matter how much she tries to reassure herself, she can't help but shake this feeling of dread deep within her that things will only get worse for Oleander after tonight… and unfortunately, she's correct.


	3. Making New Friends in the Asylum

Later that night, at about 11 p.m., Oleander is in the inner portion of the asylum's courtyard. With the sounds of Fred arguing with himself in the background, Oleander pulls out a checklist that Cruller gave him before he left the asylum with information on all of the inmates there.

Oleander then pulls a pen out of his pocket and begins to review the list. "Boyd Cooper… That guy may have been one carton of milk short of a dairy, but with how wrapped up he was in his ramblings, I don't think that he's a threat…" He then checks off the box next to Boyd's name. "Gloria Von Gouten… A little too ditsy and out of it for my tastes, but she checks out…" He then checks the off the box next to Gloria's name. "Edgar Teglee… He may have tried to throw a canvas at my head in a fit of rage, but that chain around his ankle should keep him in place…" He then checks off the box next to Edgar's name. "Fred Bonaparte…"

Oleander then stares at Fred, who is moving his bicycle tire pawn three spaces to the left on his 'game board', or rather the chalk spaces on the ground. "N-No, I made a mistake. Can I move again?" Fred meekly asks himself as he hunches over. "No! There are no second chances in war, you imbecile. I swear, you fight worse than Wellington!" Fred retorts as he stands perfectly straight with his eyes wide open.

"I think that this speaks for itself…" Oleander amusedly says to himself as he checks off the box next to Fred's name.

"See, milky toast! Even that petit man over there sees you as pathetic!" Fred yells as he stares wide-eyed at Oleander.

Oleander then looks over the list and sees one final person that he did not check. "Dr. Caligosto Loboto… Why does that name sound so familiar…?" Oleander ponders it over in his mind and after a few minutes, shrugs his shoulders. "Probably doesn't matter."

Oleander then goes over to the orderly, Crispin Whitehead, who is laughing to himself while watching Fred's antics in his 'game.' "Excuse me, are you the head orderly?" Oleander asks Crispin as the latter stares at him indifferently with his milky eyes.

"Yes, yes I am. What do you need?" Crispin asks Oleander as he lets out a sigh of disdain, obviously irritated that his fun was interrupted.

"I'm with the Psychonauts and I'm running a security check on this place. Do you know where I can find a patient named Caligosto Loboto? "

"I'm sorry, but Dr. Loboto is busy at the moment. Now please step away from my elevator…" Crispin says as he sneers at the Psychonaut.

"Lighten up, Orderly Whitehead…" Dr. Loboto says as he calmly walks out of a dark section of the courtyard with his usual big, toothy grin on his face. "We wouldn't want to scare off our guest…" Loboto gives Oleander a confused look. "And who's this guy? Where's that perky Brazilian one who's clearly nervous around me or that stiff German one that I love to mess around with?" Loboto shrugs his shoulders. "Doesn't matter with me, hell, I could have fun with this little guy."

Loboto then pinches Oleander's cheek with his hand. "Who's a cute little Psychonaut? You are. You are." Loboto says in a condescending tone while Oleander scowls at him. "Aw, he's turning red like a little tomato! Hahahaaaaa!"

Oleander then hears the voice of his father. "Bun Bun Bun!" In a fit of rage, Oleander uses his telekinesis to grab Loboto and slam him against a nearby wall and hold him in place. Oleander then approaches Loboto and gets right in the mad, still-smiling, doctor's face.

"I'm General Morceau Oleander, a Psychonaut, and you're in for a world of hurt, smiley!" Oleander yells at Loboto, who is savoring every moment of Oleander's disdain.

"Calm down, Rumpelstiltskin, we wouldn't want to see you have a little meltdown! Hahahaahahahaaaa!" Loboto says as he keeps laughing at Oleander with a loud, aggravating, nasally laugh.

Oleander, who's grinding his teeth in anger, begins to think about his next course of action. "Just kill him, Oleander; he's just some mental patient at an abandoned mental hospital. No one will miss him… and who'll tell on you? That orderly that looks like he doesn't give a damn about anything? That inmate that's playing with that bicycle pedal…"

In the background, Fred can be heard screaming to himself. "Is that the best you got, milky toast? Every breath you take further shames the Bonaparte family name!"

"Yeah Morry, just burn him to death. That'll show him whose boss!" Oleander then clenches his teeth as he tries to use his pyrokinesis to burn Loboto.

"Is it getting uncomfortably hot out here or it just me…?" Loboto nervously says as smoke starts to emit from his body.

Before Oleander can light Loboto on fire, a sharp pain shoots through his jaw, which causes him to lose his telekinetic hold on the mad doctor and forces him to grip his right cheek.

"What's wrong, had a change of heart, 'general?' Loboto asks Oleander.

"My tooth's killing me…" Oleander says in a pained tone.

At that moment, Loboto realizes that this Psychonaut may be the partner he needs for his plans, so he decides to be nice to this guy. Plus, with how volatile he is, they could have some fun while they're at it. "Look, before I was sent here, I was a dentist. You know what, since I like you better than those other two boring agents, how about I look at that tooth?" Loboto asks in an uncharacteristic act of kindness.

Oleander, knowing how easily he was able to subdue Loboto and almost kill him, decides that he's not in danger and takes the madman up on his offer. Loboto then leads Oleander up to his laboratory at the top of the asylum and has the coach sit in a nearby dentist chair.

Loboto then takes out his dental mirror and checks the inside of Oleander's mouth. "Yep, here's the problem… you have a cavity on your right premolar. Not to mention, you have acute gingivitis, a slightly receding gum line, and by the look of it, your wisdom teeth need to be removed. May I ask what incompetent shyster of a dentist you go to that allows your mouth to be in such a state of disrepair?" Loboto calmly asks Oleander.

"While the Psychonauts is a government agency, we probably have the worst dental plan to end all dental plans." Oleander irritably states.

"How bad could it possibly be, General Oleander?"

"The dentist is a guy named Dr. Freud and he likes to amuse all of his patients with a puppet named Sigmund that he gave the most irritating personality in the world. Not to mention, he doesn't even clean my teeth and just looks them over."

"'Fun' dentists…" Loboto shudders. Now THAT is a group of demented freaks, and this is coming from a deranged inmate at an abandoned asylum."

"Speaking of which, how did you end up here, Loboto?"

A big grin spreads across Loboto's face. "There are many, MANY reasons as to why I am here, my vertically challenged friend; and like Christmas presents under the tree, I would like to keep them as a surprise and reveal them at the right moments. However, I am willing to give you one of them.

You see, I have misophonia, a disorder where certain noises irritate me to no end. So one day, I'm in my office when a patient walked in. I sat them in the chair, got the bib on them, and then out of the blue, she started talking to me in this sugary, sweet voice, like one of those high-pitched pixies in some fantasy movie. Anyways, this girl just kept talking, and talking, and talking and all the while I was holding back my anger and disdain that I'm feeling towards her until I finally snapped, tore out her trachea with my robotic claw, and put it in a jar which I kept by my nightstand."

"I see…" Oleander says with a bit of hesitation in his voice, not knowing if this nut would suddenly snap and add his trachea to the collection.

Loboto, knowing full well what Oleander's tone of voice means, shakes his head. "I know what you're thinking: You're afraid that if you say the wrong thing, I'm going to kill you right on the spot; but don't worry, General Oleander, if I wanted to kill you, I would have done so already… On the contrary, I actually really like the cut of your jib and prefer your company over that of those other two agents that come here, because unlike them, you're not afraid to show your true colors. But I do have to wonder, why did you come here tonight? I'm only asking because I was expecting the bland, stiff agent in the striped sweater to come tonight."

"Well, I lost my temper earlier today and assaulted him; thus, I was forced to cover his shift as punishment."

Loboto then starts manically laughing. "You incapacitated Captain Frowny-Frown!? This just keeps getting better and better! I always hated that guy, but his cold, uncaring demeanor makes it fun to mess around with. But enough about me, why don't you tell me a little bit about yourself, General. How's your week going?"

"Sorry, but I don't feel comfortable telling you about myself." Oleander coldly responds.

Loboto walks over to a large gas tank that he has in the room to prep the laughing gas for the cavity treatment. "General Oleander, I'm a dentist, we're like the priests of the medical world. If you can't open up to me, then who can you open up to?"

Oleander then contemplates to himself whether or not to open up to this psycho. Sure, it was probably unwise to make small talk with some mental patient wearing a shower cap, but what's the harm? It's not like this guy's the Boogieman and will hide in his closet when he's sleeping. Plus, he seems like a more competent dentist than the one that Truman Zanotto is having him go to.

"Honestly, this last week wasn't all that nice to me. You see, yesterday I had finally built up the courage to ask out my co-worker, Milla Vodello, and I went all out to impress her. I got a haircut, a new outfit, and I even bought some expensive sissy French cologne that smells like crap; and lo and behold, when I find her that day, I overhear that she's been dating Nein for two months!" Oleander punctuates his sentence by pounding his fists on the arms of the chair.

"She chose that bland stick-in-the-mud over you!? What does he have that you don't!? You have a bravado personality with zing, a chiseled physique with healthy tan, and a glorious moustache! I bet that pasty introvert of an agent couldn't even grow peach fuzz if he wanted to." Loboto boldly states as he puts a mask on Oleander and releases the laughing gas, thus calming the frazzled coach down as he started working on Oleander's cavity.

30 minutes later, Loboto has successfully treated Oleander's cavity, in addition to also removing his wisdom teeth. "Feeling better, General Oleander?" Loboto asks as he washes his tools in a nearby sink.

Oleander lightly rubs his jaw, which while a little sore, is still much better than when he entered the asylum. "I have to hand it to you, Loboto, you're better than Dr. Freud and his damn puppet."

"You're too kind, General Oleander. Look, how about you come back tomorrow night and I'll give you a general cleaning?"

Oleander pauses to think about the decision; for he is not worried about his own safety, but rather, how his reputation would be effected if it was discovered that he was associating with a mental patient.

"Aw, come on, you're the first Psychonaut that came here that I actually like. It'll be fun, I'll clean your teeth and I'll let you hear some recordings of me irritating the hell out of Nein."

Upon hearing that last part, a grin spreads across Oleander's face. "I think that this will be the start of a beautiful friendship, Loboto."

Oleander then takes out his checklist and checks off the box next to Loboto's name and then proceeds to leave the asylum and return to his home for the night. The next morning, as Oleander finishes his first Basic Braining course for the day, Milla worriedly runs up to Oleander. As soon as he sees Milla, Oleander notices that something is bothering her, for her eyes are bloodshot, her hair is a mess, as well as her outfit, and her normal warm, inviting smile is replaced with a worried frown. Oleander can tell that whatever is bothering her, she didn't get any sleep last night, probably from visiting her boyfriend Nein at the hospital. Knowing that she will probably lecture him on how he assaulted Nein the other day, he decides to act cold towards her.

"Agent Vodello…" Oleander coldly says to the Milla as her eyes nervously dart around the room.

"Hello, Morry, I just wanted to see how your night patrolling the asylum went." Milla nervously says as she dreads that Loboto pushed the coach's volatile psyche over the edge.

"It was fine, Vodello. There were no issues."

Milla sighs in relief and puts a hand to her chest as her usual warm smile returns to her face. "I'm so glad to hear that, Morry. Thankfully, tonight is my night to patrol the asylum, so you can go straight home, darling."

"You know, Vodello, I actually enjoyed patrolling the asylum, so how about I cover your shift tonight?"

Milla's eyes start to widen. "D-Don't be ridiculous, Morrey. It's cold, dark and dangerous at that asylum. So why don't you go home after the day is done and I'll come by with some of my homemade cookies after my patrol shift." Milla says as she anxiously tugs at the collar of her dress.

Oleander then flashes Milla a scowl that could kill as he clenches his teeth. "Look, Vodello, I'm not one of your children at that orphanage that you love so much! I am a grown man who can take care of himself. So please respect my desires and let me cover your shift tonight." Oleander says as he turns away from Milla. "Now if you don't mind, Vodello, I have to prepare for the next Basic Braining class in 15 minutes."

Milla then pauses, standing still as she stares at Oleander with sad, worried eyes. She wants to ask Oleander to describe his experience with Loboto. She wants to ask him why he wants to cover her shift that night. But all that come out of her mouth is "Fine," which she says in a sullen voice as she leaves the Kids' Cabins area.

As Milla returns to her post at the lake, she can't help but think about Oleander's situation; but she is also relieved that she doesn't have to deal with that disturbing dentist. Maybe she had underestimated Oleander and he was able to be unfazed by Loboto. Maybe he actually thrived around confrontational people like Loboto and this is a good outlet for his rage… Or maybe, it's a sign that the worst has yet to come.


	4. Pounce, Big Bunny, Pounce!

Later that night, Oleander is sitting in one of the dental chairs in Loboto's holding area, listening to one of the mad doctor's stories, but all he can think about is why Milla was acting so overly protective of him earlier that day. Really, what was she so nervous about? He's a fully certified Psychonaut who is more than capable of taking care of himself. Maybe she was doing it out of concern for his wellbeing. Or maybe… "You're a pathetic, worthless, miserable excuse for little bunny that'll be ground up if left alone." Oleander hears the voice of his father tell him in a condescending voice.

"And then I asked Nien, 'So, do you think that we bleed the same colored blood?', as I extended my claw in his general direction. Ha! You should of seen how flushed his face was as he awkwardly backed away from me!" Loboto says as he keels over laughing, to which Oleander's only response is a sad sigh.

For once in his demented life, Loboto felt a new feeling upon seeing his new friend in distress. It wasn't that he never saw sadness, heck, seeing people sad gave him such a rush of pleasure and excitement, but with Oleander, this Psychonaut that he met only just the other day, he felt for the first time a feeling of worry; a feeling that made him want to make his new friend feel better.

In response, Loboto pulls out a stool and sits next to Oleander. "General Oleander, I've noticed that you're less lively tonight. Is there anything that you would like to talk about?"

"It's just Milla… Earlier today, she begged me not to take her shift and come here. I don't know if it's my short size or what, but she tends to try to mother me and treat me like one of her goddamn children at that goddamn orphanage that she used to work at. I am not some little boy, I am a MAN!" Oleander punctuates his sentence by punching the arm of the chair.

"Orphanages… Boy, do they bring back good memories…" Loboto says as he tilts his head, entranced with thoughts of nostalgia."

"You were an orphan, Loboto?" Oleander asks with intrigue, snapping Loboto out of his thoughts.

"No, I just have memories with the buildings. You see, one night a few years ago, I was in my house, reading the paper, when out of nowhere, I got this sudden urge to burn a building down; so I pulled out a map, closed my eyes, twirled my finger, and pointed to a random building, and that building I chose happened to be an orphanage."

Loboto starts wiggled his fingers as a big, delighted grin spreads across his face. "So at about 10:00 p.m., I drive out there in my car, go to the rear of the buildings, and started throwing Molotov cocktails through the windows. You should have seen it, General Oleander! By the time the people inside realized what was happening, it was all too late! As that building burned down, you should have heard the cries of those children as they begged for help; and while this was happening, I laughed, laughed and then laughed some more! HAAAAAAA!" Loboto says with all of the excitement of a child opening their Christmas presents.

And as quickly as Loboto's excitement came, it left as he mellowed a bit. "But sadly, a few pedestrians saw me fleeing the scene while I sang my burning song, which I created just for the occasion, and the police arrested me for arson soon after."

"Burning song? You seriously created a burning song, Loboto?"

"Sure did, General Oleander, and it goes something like this…"

Loboto then gets off the stool and begins to sing in a raspier, higher-pitched voice than normal.

"Joy to the world, the orphanage burned down

And all the orphans died

They all screamed in sorrow and I laugh until tomorrow

They're rotting and burning in Hell! HA!

They're rotting and burning in Hell! HA!

They're all rotting and burning in Hell!"

Loboto then stops singing and turns to face the entrance. "Sheegore! Come in here, I need you for the chorus of 'Joy to the World, the Orphans are Dead!'"

"I don't need to hear any more of your song, Loboto." Oleander retorts with an awkward look on his face.

Sheegore then nervously skitters into the room wearing a top hat and carrying a cane. "I-I'm here to sing the chorus, Dr. Loboto..." The timid girl says as she cowers in front of her sadistic boss.

"Change in plans, Sheegore; just go back and do whatever it is that you do when I don't give a damn about you." Loboto pouts, disappointed in not being able to sing his song; to which Sheegore responds by running out of the room.

"If only something like that would happen to Milla's orphanage…" Oleander remarks, considering what it would be like to have the Great Milla Vodello knocked down a peg.

"You must really have a thing against this woman, General." Loboto notices with intrigue.

"Well, I loved her for years, only to find out that she was only my friend because she pitied me for my height. Do you know how painful it is when the person you love rejects you because of physical features beyond your control?"

Loboto then gently places his hand on Oleander's shoulder. "Her name was Betty Symons, a student who went to Dentist School with me. One day, I decided to ask her out, and I mean, I poured my heart out to this girl, but how did she respond? She laughed in my face and started calling me hurtful names like 'Blue Berry Boy' and 'Christmas Eyes'…" Loboto says with a bitter growl.

At this moment, Oleander notices the similarities between Loboto and Bobby Zilch: the slender figure, the blue skin, and the red and green eyes. "That reminds me, Loboto… Are you by any chance related to a kid named Bobby Zilch?"

"Who gave you the idea that I'm related to that kid? Was it his bitch of a mother, Nancy Zilch? Because if it is, then I'll tell you what I've told her several dozen times over the course of 12 years: I may or may not have had a drunken encounter with her, but that boy is not mine until I see a DNA test. If you're so confident, Nancy, then where are your papers? Huh? HUH!?" Loboto yells as he clenches his fist and claw.

Oleander slightly recoils in his chair. "Sorry I asked…"

Loboto, as if a switch was randomly flicked in his head, reverts back to his more upbeat tone of voice. "So anyways, where was I…? Oh right! So latter that night, I snuck into her dorm room with a buzz saw, not to kill her, mind you, but rather, to make her a little more… ugly. Anyways, I approach her bed with the saw, but once I turned it on, she woke up, screamed, and pushed me back; which caused me to fall on the ground and the saw to sever my right arm off."

Loboto eyes his robotic claw as he bends the ends in and out. "Unfortunately, she soon called the cops, so I had to quickly get out of there and leave my arm behind; thus, I had to use my experience in engineering, which I minored in, to build myself a right arm so that I could at least utilize that portion of my body." Loboto shrugs his shoulders. "It didn't hamper me too much, because I was born a lefty."

Loboto then wraps his arms around Oleander's shoulders. "But with our combined efforts, General Oleander, we'll be able to execute a plan that will get your revenge and global domination at the same time!"

"So, got any ideas, Loboto?"

"I'm glad you asked, my dear friend. Come, I have something to show you…" Loboto says as he walks towards the entrance to the room.

Loboto then guides Oleander to his actual laboratory, where he sees a heap of scrap metal, which is probably some sort of tank, judging by the treads present, and a blackboard filled with complicated mathematical work that gave him a headache just looking at. Loboto then pulls out a blueprint with a picture of a strange tank on it. "Behold! The Psychic Death Tank!" Loboto screams at the top of his lungs.

"I never thought I'd see the day where two of my lifetime passions, psychic fighting and weapons of war, are combined into one beautiful form?" Oleander says in astonishment as he strokes the blueprint with his hand to make sure that he isn't seeing things.

"Glad to know that an official Psychonaut is impressed with the idea." Loboto says with a smirk on his face, proud that a member of the Psychonauts, the go-to-psychic international organization, and his new best friend nonetheless, was amazed with his diabolical plan.

So what gives this tank its psychic capabilities, psytanium? Also, I noticed that there's no entrance point on this tank, so how does one maneuver it?"

"An excellent question, General Oleander! You see, those two questions share a common answer: the brains of psychics. You see, I've always had a fascination of the human mind and studied it as a hobby; and during my studies, I've managed to create a sneezing powder so potent that it can cause anyone that smells it to sneeze their brain right out their nose."

Upon hearing that bit of information, Oleander starts to think that this is too good to be true and that Loboto's plan is a bunch of fluff. Powder that can cause someone to sneeze their brain out; that sounds like some story that they'd right for True Psychic Tales Magazine. Thus, Oleander, crossing his arms, questions Loboto. "If this sneezing powder works like you say it does, Loboto, why don't I see you use it on someone?"

Loboto shrugs his shoulders. "If you wish… Sheegore! A moment of your time!" Loboto yells as Sheegore, who is holding Mr. Pokeylope, rushes into the room immediately after the mad doctor called her.

"Y-Yes, Dr. Loboto…?" Sheegore askes as she nervously cradles Mr. Pokeylope.

Without warning, Loboto puts his claw near Sheegore's face and then cranks it, which causes a green powder to eject from the claws tip. After trying her best to hold back the sneeze, the nervous assistant sneezes out her brain, which hits the floor and lands tight in front of her feet as her body goes limp. "Teeee-veeee…." Sheegore mindlessly says as she starts to drool a little and walks out of the room while still holding Mr. Pokeylope.

Loboto then walks over and picks up Sheegore's brain. "Like de-pitting an olive!" Loboto says matter-of-factly.

"I can't believe it, you actually did it… So is your assistant going to be alright?" Loboto asks, never having seen a person walk around without a brain.

"Sheegore, she'll be fine. I've tested this powder on her dozens of times; I'll just simply re-brain her when I feel like it." Loboto responds with the relaxed wave of his hand.

"So if you're capable of building a fleet of Psychic Death Tanks and taking over the world, why are you letting me in on it? I mean, for all you know, I could get you arrested for this sort of thing." Oleander asks, preparing himself for any dirty tricks that Loboto may try to use to silence him.

"Well, first most, I may be crazy, but I know who I like and don't like, and I know for a fact that I feel like you're one of the few people who actually understand me. Also, in order to execute this plan, I'm going to need to get many psychic brains, so I'll need you to use your connections to get the Psychonauts to send individual agents here for harvesting. Plus, with your combat experience, you could use your combat expertise to guide our army of psychic death tanks to victory!" Loboto proclaims with his fist proudly raised in the air.

For once in his life, Oleander feels truly needed: he isn't that kid that everyone laughed at, he isn't that man who was rejected from the Military, he isn't a tool that the Psychonauts use when they see fit. He is Oleander, the general who will make them pay; who will make every last one of them grovel on their knees, begging for mercy and forgiveness. He is no longer a small bunny; no, he is the biggest bunny that the world has ever seen!

A maniacal grin spreads across Oleander's face. "I have an even better idea, Loboto: Why don't we invade Whispering Rock and steal the campers' brains. Not only do they have about the same amount of raw energy, but it would be a whole lot easier than going up against full-fledged Psychonauts."

"I'd love to, General Oleander, but to do so would be to get past those two pesky agents and we both know that they would easily stop our attempts or call in for reinforcement if need be!" Loboto grunts in frustration.

"Don't worry about Sasha and Milla; I'm close with them, so I can easily catch them off guard. So when are we going to set our plan into motion?" Oleander asks with a look of excitement on his face.

"Well, I need time to build the tank and prepare our method for bringing the brains here, so I think it should be ready in about a year. You just take over all of the patrol shifts here so that no one at your agency gets wind of our plans."

"Consider it done." Oleander Says with a nod.

"Now there's one last thing: What should we name our master plan? We can't be credible villains without a cool name for our evil plan." Loboto says as he scratches his head and tries to concentrate.

Oleander then slowly walks out of the lab, with Loboto following right behind him, and goes over to the railing where he can easily see Whispering Rock, which has its outdoor lights on. "Operation Easter… because no longer am I a little bunny, but rather, the most important bunny of them all; and like with the Easter Bunny, the world shall taste my eggs!" Oleander yells as he bursts out into a maniacal laugh, with Loboto soon following suit.


	5. When Things Fall into Place

For the next year, Oleander and Loboto spend their nights extensively working on the psychic death tank. Even though it's grueling work, building the tank, keeping it secret from the Psychonauts, etc., it's all worth it in the end when Oleander and Loboto gaze upon their completed masterpiece in all its glory.

"So now that the tank's done, how are we gonna get the campers to come up here? It's not like I can have them come to me for one-on-one 'secret training' after the coach before me was caught molesting several campers. Damn pedophiles going and ruining my- err, our plans!" Oleander complains as he gently strokes his moustache as he thinks of a solution.

After a few seconds of contemplation, Oleander is snapped out of his thoughts when Loboto puts his hand on Oleander's shoulder. "What makes you think that we have to round up those brats ourselves, General Oleander?" Loboto excitedly asks as he flashes the coach a big, toothy grin.

"Well, how else are we supposed to do it? Send the inmates who barely seem to register where they are? Or an even better idea, how about sending your indifferent, nearly blind orderly to do the job?" Oleander, who is not in the mood for any antics when he's so close to achieving his retribution, curtly asks Loboto.

"Just give me one quick moment, General Oleander…" Loboto calmly says as he raises his finger to emphasize his point while he grabs a butterfly net out of a nearby drawer and leaves the lab.

Loboto then briskly makes his way out of the asylum and to the nearby beach, where he then dips his net in the water and starts fishing around. After a few seconds of searching the water with his net with no results, Loboto suddenly feels some weight in the net as the unknown creature tries to free itself. After a short, one-sided battle, Loboto pulls the net out of the water to reveal his prize: a terrified lungfish; though the fear that the poor creature fear isn't unwarranted as its captor flashes it a diabolical, sadistic grin and maniacally laughs as he transports it into the depths of the asylum.

When Loboto returns to the lab, he pulls out a fishbowl that he keeps for situations like this, puts it on a stool and puts the lungfish inside it. "A lungfish? How the hell are we gonna capture children with that thing, Loboto? Lure the children here with a seafood platter?" Oleander scoffs, unimpressed with Loboto's 'plan'.

Loboto then goes over to a nearby machine, which Oleander never bothered to inquire about. "You'll be singing a different tune after I use the Progression Zapper on it." Loboto chirps as he attaches the helmet that is wired to the device on the lungfish's head, to which the lungfish replies to with a nervous facial expression. "Sheegore! Pull the lever so that General Oleander may witness the power of the Progression Zapper!" Loboto yells to Sheegore, who is shaking in the lab's doorway, while pointing to the lever that is right next to him.

"B-But Dr. Loboto, the lever is right next to you…" Shegore meekly responds, her posture slumped as she points a shaky finger to the lever that is two inches away from him.

Loboto turns to face the lever. "Ah, so it is… As you were, Sheegore." Loboto says as he shoos her out of the lab with a wave of his hand; to which she responds to by quickly scurrying out of the lab. "Anyways, prepare yourself, General Oleander, for you are about to witness the manipulation of evolution!" Loboto yells at the top of his lungs as he pulls the lever for the Progression Zapper.

The Progression Zapper then proceeds to violently shake and rumble as a strange, purple electricity flows from the machine and into the lungfishes head through the helmet. The lungfish then begins to make painful grunts and contortions as its body begins to grow in size. After a few seconds, the lungfish has grown to the point where the fishbowl shatters and it grows a set of arms, legs, and sharp fangs. The process then concludes with the skin on the lungfish's head growing around the helmet, fussing it to the poor creature's head. "It is complete!" Loboto says as he gestures to the creature and turns off the Progression Zapper.

"I-I… How?" Oleander says, his eyes wide from disbelief, as he gazes upon the hulking lungfish before him.

"Quite simple, really, I just utilized the power of psytanium to make it more advanced, more powerful, and with that helmet fused into its mind, more obedient. So all we have to do is send our little friend to the camp and they'll gather those pesky brains for us. I think that we've covered all of our tracks for the first day of camp tomorrow; wouldn't you agree, General Oleander?"

"I agree, Loboto. Tomorrow night, we'll send the lungfish into the woods while the campers get situated in their cabins." Oleander says to the mad doctor, who agrees with him with a silent nod. Oleander then waves to Loboto and then proceeds to head to the lower level of the asylum.

As Oleander walks through the decapitated corridor, he can't help but think that things may finally work out for him, that he'll finally be a big bunny. He can just imagine it now: commanding a large fleet of psychic death tanks, he would take the world by storm. One by one, the countries of the world would submit to his will and he would be the supreme leader of Earth. It would be great: bunnies would roam free and would be venerated, peace-loving hippies would be detained, and people would be forced to love him, or be executed.

But as Oleander thinks about his bright future, he hears the voice of his father. "Why would anyone want to work with a worthless, little bunny like you? If Loboto has any common sense, he'll kick you to the curb once your usefulness is up. Perhaps he'll serve you as a little snack to that lungfish. Ha ha ha!"

Oleander's happiness then morphs into angry paranoia. If Loboto had the capabilities to easily turn a lungfish into a hulking monstrosity, in addition to the psychic death tank, then what's stopping that psychopathic dentist from betraying him when his back is turned? He could see it now: He and Loboto manage to conquer the word and then that quack says something along the lines of "Now there's only one little problem remaining…" and then has the death tanks open fire on him while he just laughs. No, Oleander knows better; he knows that he needs to strike Loboto down before that loony knows what hit him. But how could he do it?

Oleander's train of thought is broken when he hears inane rambling further down the hall. When he goes to investigate them, he sees Boyd, who is unshaven and in a pair of pajamas, kneeling on the ground as he doodles conspiracy theories on the wall and talks about them to himself. Oleander's face then morphs into a demented grin as his plan comes together. "Hey Cooper, what's up?" Oleander asks the disgruntled man who responds by standing up and facing the coach while stiff as a board.

"Why do you want to know that? Who sent you? Was it the guys that produce those packing peanuts?" Boyd nervously asks as his eyes dart around the room.

Oleander, who is knowledgeable in psychological manipulation from his training, decides to bend Boyd to his will through his focal point: milk. "So Cooper, I hear that you have a thing for milk…" Oleander remarks as he pulls out a carton of milk, which he had on his person due to the fact that Milla gave it to him, as well as a bag of her homemade cookies, as a gesture of good will. Oleander hated that she gave him such a childish snack, but he didn't have the heart to throw them out in front of her, he hung onto them and forgot about them until just that moment.

"Milk…" Boyd says in a shaky voice as Oleander pours the beverage into a glass that Milla also provided him.

Boyd then slowly extends his trembling arm and reluctantly takes the beverage. After sniffing and shaking the glass a little just to make sure that it wasn't tainted by those eggheads who were secretly running an underground gherkin empire in his old bathroom, the paranoid inmate takes a sip of the beverage.

"How about some cookies to go with that milk?" Oleander asks as he puts the cookies on a plate, yet again courtesy of Milla.

Boyd knows that he would be truly insane to deny these cookies; for a glass of milk without cookies is like a bird without wings, or a big corporation without lies, or a conspiracy without incoherent speculation that leads to even more conspiracies. Thus, Boyd decides to grab a cookie.

Oleander, seeing how Boyd's guard is down and is focused on the cookies, pulls out a pocket watch and starts swinging it in front of the plate, which thanks to his psychic powers, is able put Boyd into a hypnotic trance the second he lays eyes on the swinging watch. "Cooper, I am your new employer. You will obey my every order if you wish to remain employed." Oleander says in a surprising calm, soothing voice.

"What are your orders, sir?" Boyd asks as his eyes follow the arc of the swinging watch.

"I'll report back to you momentarily, Cooper. In the meantime, just stay put and eat these cookies." Oleander says as he hands the plate of cookies to Boyd and goes to another part of the asylum to think his plan over.

20 minutes later, Oleander returns to Boyd, who is still eating the cookies. "Cooper, you're the security guard for this place and you are fully trained."

"I am the guard. I've been fully trained." Boyd parrots back, to which Oleander replies with an affirmative nod."

"Good. And because of your position, the Milkman is the only one who has the key to the gate. Everyone loves the Milkman's milk, but sadly, he's sleeping on the job. Now, you may think that you're the Milkman, but you're not; you're the guard. When the Milkman finally does wake up, he will deliver his milk to this establishment and whitewash all that transpired here." Oleander says as he hands Boyd a Thorney Towers security uniform and a file that summarizes what was just told. "Now change into your uniform and guard the gate."

"Right away, sir!" Boyd says as he puts on his uniform and goes to the gate. As Boyd leaves the area, Oleander smiles as he witnesses his plan coming together, for it is a simple, yet ingenious plan: Once the psychic death tank plan is put into motion, he will steal Loboto's designs for the tank, go into Boyd's mind, awaken the Milkman, and watch Boyd burn down the asylum with Loboto still in it. That way, not only will Loboto be out of the picture and won't be able to betray him if they succeed, but Oleander will have a way to destroy all the evidence and silence Loboto if anything goes wrong.

At this moment, Oleander feels confident that no part of his airtight plan can go awry, but then he realizes an issue that could ruin the whole thing: the campers' brains. Sure, they might not be powerful, but they aren't the most capable minds out there. How could cheery minds like Clem and Crystal's, cowardly minds like Maloof and Elton's possibly utilize the full potential of these weapons to kill hundreds upon thousands of people? Maybe Bobby's mind would work, but the boy lack discipline. No, what Oleander needs is a kid who has focus and perseverance to spare, a kid whose mind is brimming with power and potential, a kid whose life is so miserable that they would jump at the chance to be a part of Whispering Rock and strive to be a Psychonaut.

Fortunately, thanks to the Psychonauts Intel Department, he knows where to possibly find such a child: the Aquato Traveling Circus, a depraved performing group of powerful psychics; the perfect place to find a child yearning to escape that life of mediocrity and make something of themself by becoming a Psychonaut. And as an added bonus, they just so happens to be currently stationed about three or so hours from his current location, so it shouldn't be too bad of a drive.

Oleander then returns to the campgrounds, gets in his jeep, and drives off to the current location of the circus. When he arrives at the circus, the coach puts on a black cloak, stilts, and a pink, smiling bunny mask that he picked up from a local part store to conceal his identity and then proceeds over to the circus tent, where the performers are thanking the leaving guests for being a great audience.

In the group of performers, there are two adults, probably the parents, and six children, three boys and three girls, of ages ranging from eight to 13. Oleander takes a look at the children and notices how five of them look as happy as their parents with their current life, much to his disappointment; but one of the kids stands out to him. The child is a boy with dark hair who looks to be about ten, but unlike his siblings, he is standing off to the side with a look of depression on his face, as if this is utter torture for him. Yes, this child has a look in his eye that says that he's going places; and by places, the brain tank would be a prime candidate. Oleander, sure of his decision, subtle signals for the boy to come over to him with a light wag of his finger; to which he responds to by approaching the coach.

"What?" The boy curtly asks with a scowl on his face as he folds his arms in disdain.

"Young man, I've heard about your family. Are you a psychic?" Oleander asks as he tries to disguise his voice.

"Yes I am, but it's not like I can leave this godforsaken circus. I want to be a Psychonaut, see the world and fight for mental freedom, but all my dad wants is to punish me for my curse by performing in this circus until the day I die!" The boy bitterly states as he considers his hopeless situation.

Oleander, seeing as this kid is just what he needs for his plans, takes this opportunity to put te idea of Whispering Rockin his head. "Say kid, I hear that the Psychonauts are looking for young, determined psychics with that kind of determination. Why don't you come to Whispering Rock Psychic Summer Camp so you can learn about the field and enter the track to become a Psychonaut?" Oleander says as he pulls a Whispering Rock pamphlet from his pocket and offers it to the boy.

With a hint of hesitation, the boy takes the pamphlet. "I really want to go to this camp, sir, but I know that my parents would kill me before they'd let me go… especially my father." The boy says with a defeatist attitude as he hangs his head in sorrow.

Oleander, knowing what it's like to deal with your father's disapproval, begins to stand up for the young boy before him. "Look kid, life is like a rabbit farm: big bunnies that shape their own paths will thrive while the little bunnies submit to the will of others and are eaten as a result. I don't know about you kid, but I think that you're a big bunny. Even if your parents say no, don't let that stop you from chasing your dreams." Oleander states as he places a reassuring hand on the young boy's shoulder, instantly making him feel better.

"Thanks sir! That's just what I needed to give me the courage to tell my parents that I'm going to be a Psychonaut; though I have to first read the pamphlet to build up my case to them." The boy says with a confident smile on his face with eyes filled with hope of the endless possibilities placed before him.

Seeing that his work here is done, Oleander quickly rushes off to his jeep and then drives back to his apartment with a big grin on his face, proud of the fact that his plan is coming together.

Meanwhile, in Milla's apartment, she is unable to get any sleep due to the anxiety brought on by Oleander's declining mental stability and decides to call Sasha to help herself feel better.

After a few seconds of hearing the phone ring, Milla is greeted by Sasha. "Do you realize that it's one o'clock in the morning, Agent Vodello? What do you want?" Sasha asks in a groggy voice as he begins to yawn.

Milla shakes her head and slightly grins at how hilariously stiff her partner can sometimes be. "Sasha, we have been dating for quite some time now, please just call me by my first name. As for why I'm calling, it's about Morry…" Milla says as her voice shifts to one of concern as her sweet smile turns into a frown.

A heavy sigh and a palm to the forehead can be heard from Sasha's end of the phone. "Agent Vodel- err, Milla, for the last time: Morry has just been going through a cold phase as of lately. You know how much he hates being the coach at the camp and who could blame him? He'll be better once camp has concluded for the year." Sasha calmly tells Milla, whose fingers are fidgeting out of angst.

"But Sasha, I feel that something is wrong with Morrey. For the past year, he's been getting colder and even less approachable than normal. I'm really worried about him Sasha, what should I do?" Milla says with a voice filled with worry as she tightly grips the phone.

"Well, the man insists that he patrols the Thorny Towers for us every night; so maybe the inmates have made him have to be colder. You can't be warm with those people, especially that one dentist…" Sasha says with a slight shudder, recalling his bad memories with Loboto. "Just trust me, everything will be fine. Goodnight, Agent Vodello." Sasha says as he immediately ends the call.

Milla then tries to convince her that Oleander is fine as she struggles to get some sleep. But little does she know that Oleander is not fine, for the next day his plans would finally be put into motion. He would finally have his revenge on those who looked down on him. He would finally become a big bunny.

* * *

 **To whom it may concern: This is the final Chapter of "Oleander's Decent into Madness". I hope you guys had as much fun reading it as I had writing it. I will be writing more Psychonaut fanfics in the future; but for now, I have other stories that I want to write. However, do not despair, for I already have an idea for my next Psychonauts fanfic that pertains to everyone's favorite angry, fat critic.**


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